My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
