Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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