did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
