if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Are my feet made of real feet?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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