Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
