Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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