3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
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