The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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