Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize