So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Randomize
