What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
