Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
