Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
