I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Randomize
