i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
