bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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