I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I just had sex on a roof
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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