She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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