Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
