hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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