I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
