So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
