My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
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