hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I look better un-naked...
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
