Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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