I accidentally had phone sex last night
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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