I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
