Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
