I bet he comes in French.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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