I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
time to smoke my breakfast
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
