If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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