Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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