He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So much rum. So many feels.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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