I feel like abortions should bother me more
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Randomize
