you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Of course I have a pirate flag
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
