when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
