Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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