Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
