they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
