Already got asked if we're dating
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
