What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
