I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
