can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
