belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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