Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
