I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
