Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
