Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
