i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Randomize