Christians are straight up FREAKS
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
